One of the things I have learned is to be very good at editing my self talk. Whenever I catch myself saying anything negative towards myself I automatically change the thought into a positive one.
✨Basically, I don’t take any shit from myself anymore.
I wouldn’t tolerate any of my friends or family talking badly about themselves so why should I tolerate that for myself?
Also, when you stop taking shit from yourself you automatically stop taking shit from others. People also start to respect you more. Because even if you don’t talk about it they get the vibe from you that you’re not one to be fucked with.
✨Positive self talk is vitally important. We have to live in this body and in this mind of ours for now and it’s up to us to make this a nice place to live in.
For me it’s been a long process of getting better and better at this. Now it’s usually so fast that it’s automatic.
✨I see it as picking weeds. Or raising a toddler…
What I do is to talk back to myself. For example if I would think – I am such a failure – I talk back at myself and say – Well, I may fail sometimes but mostly I don’t. And that is good enough. I don’t have to be perfect. And what does being a failure mean anyway?
I also notice any negative generalisations. Anything that comes after – I am always…/I always… – is always a lie. Negative generalisations towards ourselves or others are simply not true. Even the worst of us have their good moments.
When my self talk is extra bad sometimes I just say to myself – STOP! Aloud if needed… I try my best to be gentle with myself but sometimes you just have to draw a clear line.
We can only hold one thought at a time and like attracts like. Negative thoughts attract more negative thoughts. Positive thoughts attract more positive thoughts. So by being vigilant and careful about what thoughts I allow in my head has really changed my life.
✨Repeat after me: I don’t take shit from myself anymore!
Do you have any tricks to help your self talk to stay positive?
Lots of love, Gian Tara
